Origin of the Species

First there was the clay cat, but the clay cat soon dried out and cracked. Though it became stiff and unyielding, it failed to append to the population, and without being able to perform this vital function this race died out.

Then came plasticine cat which roamed with the dinosaurs. The plasticine cat remained malleable and unlike the clay was able to add to the population and so continued to survive, for the plasticine cat was fitter, swifter, stronger and all together more superior to the clay cat.

But at the end of the plasticine epoch there came a new mutant cat for evolution had resulted in the blu-tack cat. Like the plasticine cat it remained malleable, but it had other advantages, such as unparalleled traction that enabled it to scale sheer walls and even occupy hitherto uninhabitable territory of the ceiling. And where as the plasticine cat could only add to the population, the blu-tack cat multiplied for it was fitter, swifter, stronger, smarter, healthier and all together more superior again to the plasticine cat.

And so the blu-tack cat proliferated until one day it was realized that the blu-tack cat was taking over the office. What had started of as a small scale experiment in keeping an office pet had reproduced to plague proportions and was threatening the balance of all office life. And so it was decided that in order not to drown in a sea of blu-tack cats, drastic measures had to be taken to control the population. The blu-tack cats needed to be culled; and as someone once said that 'there are more ways to kill a cat then drowning it in cream', and this site contains some.

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Page updated : 04 Jun 2005

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